


Coping

by metaphoricallylivin



Series: Earth 25: Oh, Yeah I'm An Ugly Mess [2]
Category: DCU
Genre: Ableism, Autistic Jason Todd, Fuck DC Comics, Gen, autistic characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-11
Updated: 2017-06-11
Packaged: 2018-11-13 01:25:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11174121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/metaphoricallylivin/pseuds/metaphoricallylivin
Summary: Jason Todd has been autistic his whole life, he's had to learn to deal with it.





	Coping

**Author's Note:**

> TW for the r slur and mental illness in addition to references to bullying.
> 
> My headcanon that Jason Todd comes from a panel in Red Hood: Lost Days. The panel itself is ableist, but I've adapted it so that Jason being autistic wasn't like... a trauma response or some shit, instead he's always been autistic. I rewrote it a lot and mixed in some actual psychology and good shit. If anyone wants to talk to me about autistic Jason Todd I will love you forever.

Jason remembered when he'd first been taken for a psych eval by Bruce, a week after becoming his ward. The woman had spent 20 minutes with him before deciding he needed further testing. He came out of all of the psychiatrist appointments and the appointment with various doctors 7 months later with 2 diagnoses. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and Autism Spectrum Disorder. The doctor explained it was a developmental disability, which explained why Jason didn't quite understand people the way others did and why his spacial awareness was off. It explained a lot, from why he stimmed and why when he got overwhelmed he'd stop talking and he'd sometimes scream and throw things.

 

He remembered afterwards the months of therapy, having to unpack his trauma so many times that it stopped bothering him. He remembered going to occupation therapy, something he ended up enjoying. They would have Jason play games with them to develop his motor skills and his perception and what not. He learned how to deal, there was still an undertone of some behaviors being “bad” behaviors, like repetitive movements that were visible or chewing.

 

Then Jason got tortured by the Joker. He remembered the fear, how much he just wanted a feeling of safety. He'd designed his Robin suit to feel good and comforting on his skin, slightly weighted and a soft lining, but it delivered no comfort. Jason was beaten beyond recognition, he'd been missing for too long that he was declared dead. Jason Todd died, no body to bury but dead nonetheless.

 

* * *

 

 

“His records indicate that he's autistic,” the doctor said. Talia had easily stolen the boy’s records for him.

 

“Yes, you can fix him, right?” Talia asked. When she'd found Jason in that hospital bed she'd convinced her father to use the pit on him. To make him whole again.

 

“I’m not sure fix is the right word,” the doctor said. “He'll require extensive speech therapy and I would like to bring in an occupational therapist to help. It's called autistic regression, likely the torture and the trauma of it lead to him losing the ability to verbalize. It is possible for him to regain speech, but it may take a while.”

 

“Consider it done. You have access to everything you need,” Talia said before leaving the room.

 

Jason remembered how fuzzy his brain felt then. He had so much to say, but talking was so hard. He wanted to be understood, he hated not being able to talk. The first time the speech therapist came she focused on trying to see if Jason understood anymore.

 

She would hold up cards and ask Jason to match them to objects. It was a boring activity that made Jason want to remind her he was almost 16. At least he thought he was, time was weird. Next she would talk and try to get Jason to repeat.

 

“No,” she said. “Now you try.”

 

Jason opened his mouth, but nothing came out. He tried again and again and again. He was so frustrated. She wanted him to talk instead of just pointing or stringing together vague gestures and written words. Jason couldn't though.

 

It took a month before he managed to talk even a little. There was so much praise after that, she gave him a new book to read and Talia visited. She brought her son with her. His name was Damian. 

 

“Your speech therapist and doctor tell me you're making progress. You've gone from totally non-communicative to talking in mere months, I'm impressed,” Talia said. Her smile was gentle.

 

Jason nodded, he knew that it wasn't impressive. It was childish, he'd gotten his brain so screwed up it had taken him months to do something that had once been natural.

 

“You know my father,” Damian said. He was small, maybe 6 years old.

 

“This is Bruce’s son, my son, Damian,” Talia explained, her tone was even and careful, like the slightest wrong word might make Jason explode.

 

Jason noticed that Damian looked like Bruce. They had the same nose and Damian’s hair was black, darker than Talia’s hair by a few shades. He had bright green eyes, Jason wasn't quite sure if Damian’s eyes were genetic or from his family’s exposure to the pit as they were more muted than Jason and Ra’s. There was no glow to them.

 

“Mother says when you learn to speak well again you will tell me about Father,” Damian’s looks were calculating and guarded, more so than a kid’s looks should be. Jason simply nodded.

 

Damian visited Jason weekly, listening as Jason’s speech progressed. His words went from few and far between to stuttered, but understandable. Damian taught him Arabic in return for stories about Bruce. He was absorbed in every detail about him. Batman was Damian’s hero, a fact that Jason noted. It would probably be his downfall. Making Bruce your hero only ended with a broken heart and an equally broken body.

 

* * *

 

 

Toby had lived with Jason for almost two months and in that time he'd noticed a lot of things about him. For example Toby rarely slept in his bed. The first couple days Jason had thought he'd run away or something until Toby had appeared for breakfast after sleeping in his closet. His favorite seemed to be sleeping in the bath tub, an unfortunate thing Jason had discovered when he'd come home after patrols and tried to catch a shower.

 

Another thing was he didn't like new foods. He seemed to particularly despise microwave mac and cheese. Jason made it for him once and Toby had flat out refused to eat it. He didn't like the grainy texture and he didn't like the taste of cheese apparently. He liked one particular brand of microwave falafel, dino chicken nuggets, clementines, anything made with potatoes, and anything mango flavored as Jason had discovered. Whenever they went to restaurants Toby would study the menu, looking for something that fell into his parameters of safe foods. Meanwhile Jason followed to the philosophy of “if it's edible I'll eat it”.

 

Another thing Jason noticed was how whenever he would get excited he would start bouncing up and down and moving his hands before promptly realizing the action and stopping. Jason recognized these actions almost too well, he often did them himself when he was younger. He remembered how his dad would punish him for being loud or moving a lot. He’d eventually managed to break himself of the habits. Toby hadn't quite yet.

 

 

Leslie Thompkins checked Toby out almost 3 months after Jason adopted him. She noted that there was signs of his wrist being broken and improperly healing, along with being sprained several times. His ribs had been broken and healed too. It made Jason want to reanimated Toby’s father and kill him again, more painfully that time. She'd asked Jason where the fuck he'd found him.Toby simply said that he found him.

 

“I would also recommend an evaluation for developmental disabilities,” Leslie said.

 

Toby stiffened. Jason did too, but he didn't show it, simply nodding. His school needed a physical for him to start and since Toby hadn't exactly existed formally a few months ago Leslie was their best option. She filled out the form and gave Jason another one.

 

“She thinks I'm stupid,” Toby said. “Everyone thinks I'm stupid, you probably do too.”

 

“You're not stupid,” Jason said. Sure, Toby couldn't read well and he didn't quite understand other people, but he wasn’t stupid.

 

“Sure I'm not. You're bad at lying,” Toby said.

 

“I read your school file, when they gave you an oral vocabulary test in second grade you scored as well as a high school senior. That's the opposite of stupid, kid,” Jason said, ruffling Toby’s hair.

 

“I’ve been called a retard enough times to know they can't all be wrong,” Toby said. He walked ahead of Jason.

 

“Don't ever call yourself that again. If I ever catch you thinking like that again,” Jason said. He didn't know what he was going to do, he wasn't going to punish the kid for poor self esteem.

 

“Empty threat, but whatever,” Toby rolled his eyes.

 

* * *

 

 

It took months for the evaluation. School did their own, placing Toby in an extra class for mechanics. Everyday Toby would come home from school, sulking and tell Jason how the teacher treated him. Jason had never had a special education teacher, his first school having been stretched too thin to care and by the time Jason was in Gotham Academy he'd learned how to act normal. Patronizing seemed like the right thing for one of them.

 

Toby’s diagnoses came back as dyslexia, ADHD, and ASD. The doctor had given Jason a series of pamphlets along with a letter for Toby’s school. He gave him a referral for ABA therapy, something that made Jason’s blood boil. ABA therapy was torture, it was legal torture of autistic kids to make them stop seeming autistic. He hadn't said anything to the doctor, but Jason disregarded all the information in the pamphlets. He knew more about being autistic and coping with it than the damned doctor ever would.

 

Jason decided to encourage it when Toby would stim. It was his way of communication, of showing happiness or calming himself down and Jason was going to do his hardest to make sure that no one got rid of it. Toby was not going to end up like Jason, he wasn't going to be forced to be “normal”, to feel stupid or lesser.

**Author's Note:**

> Please give me feedback.


End file.
